
Put them in their place. I like to do assigned seating, and it's important to give thought to the arrangement beforehand to sort out what combination is going to be most fun and comfortable for everyone. Seat people with similar interests together, and remember that if someone is timid they'll probably enjoy themselves more next to a person who's more outgoing. As host, your guests' enjoyment is your first priority, so if you can help them by initiating a conversation topic, you should!
Buy wisely. When shopping for a dining table, consider how you like to entertain. A round table is ideal for smaller parties, since the shape is conducive to all guests talking freely. This is harder with a rectangular table, which can accommodate more people, but those seated on opposite ends can't hear each other. Seating plans are more crucial here than with a round table, where everyone is bunched together. With chairs, the bottom line is to get something comfortable. It's definitely a personal preference.
Look at the big picture. It's nice to have special dinnerware for company. Dishes should coordinate, but don't worry about matching exactly—it's fine to use different plates for a salad course, entrée, and dessert. Keep in mind how the food you're serving is going to appear on your plate. I like simple china myself, or at least one with a white center, which flatters anything that goes on it. With a highly decorated plate, it's best to stick with pared down foods, like mixed greens or freshly cut corn.
Get in a group mentality. A big centerpiece feels passé. You used to see enormous bouquets everywhere, but that can make it really hard for guests to mingle. I think scattering really small clusters of flowers or even bowls of fruit around a table is easier, just as attractive, and even less expensive. Almost any kind of shrubbery snipped from your backyard could work with some creativity. Steer clear of flowers with a strong scent—some guests might dislike it, and you don't want it to interfere with the food.
Go easy. Fancy food isn't what makes a party special; it can even make people uncomfortable. I prefer a more informal menu, and find the simplest dishes are often the ones everyone likes the most. It's less about what you're serving than how you're serving it. Food should be easy to eat. If you've cooked rice, for example, it shouldn't be too sticky or lumpy. Tough or overly chewy meat is never good, and neither are really oversize cuts. With steaks, make sure your knives are sharp enough. If you're passing dishes around a table, avoid heavy, unwieldy platters and bowls, and make sure all the right utensils are in place for people to serve themselves. If you're doing the serving, pay attention to the amount you're putting on each guest's plate - find a balance between enough and overwhelming.
Have some sensitivity. It's important to know guests' likes and dislikes. Be careful about the length of your cocktail hour. Not everyone wants to sit around drinking for hours before they eat. Make sure you have non-alcoholic beverage options that are flavorful and look good to serve before and with dinner—one of my favorites is an Arnold Palmer. Nowadays people have so many different diets and allergies. Though as a host it's good to ask, as a guest it's also your responsibility to find a discrete way to disclose any special needs beforehand so that no one is uncomfortable when the meal arrives.
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